The Childhood Diaries of a Nervous Girl (1st July)

Another dose of my strange childhood diaries; excerpts from the 1st July, ages 11 to 22. Topics include my visit to a “Green Light District”, my experience with bizarre veggie bacon, and doing a dodgy sketch of Gandalf.

2005 (Age 11) – Woke up. Went to school. Bought books at a book fair. Watched ‘Jason and the Argonauts’. Had tea.

2006 (Age 12) – Me and Mum went round to Gran and Grandpa’s to watch England Vs. Portugal. England lost. Grandpa has bought a new car. Has Alaskan salmon. Me and Mum watched ‘The Mummy Returns.’

2007 (Age13) – Went to Ade’s house. I read in the newspaper that the car that was made entirely out of cake (I love that advert) was real. They had bakers and lots of ingredients. Ade printed out the India images on his computer, but for the first time ever, the printer had a paper jam. There was a big tribute to Princess Diana on the TV. I discovered that if you tip cows over on the Sims before you milk them, you can get milkshakes!

2008 (Age 14)- Played Wheelchair Rugby in P.E today- so fun. You can bang into each other and twizzle around. Watched “40 Greatest Romance Movies”. “Amelie” came number 8, whilst the cheeseball of a movie “Ghost” came 1st. Mum was annoyed about that. On Neopets, someone sent me an Iced Fish Cake *shrugs*. Watched a documentary hosted by Duncan Bannatyne, about somewhere in Africa that is promoting smoking to kids; one of the shareholders was an angry little gremlin guy.

2009 (Age 15) – So f*cking hot! Had a massive shower/pampering session when I got home. Did toplink festival today with *shudder* little kids. I hardly spoke. I need to build up my confidence!

2010 (Age 16) – Went strawberry picking at a farm called ‘Seldom Seen’ with Grandma and Grandad. We drove through lots of Shire-like countryside to get there. We went to the ‘Finches’ and I had chicken liver parfait, followed by a pasta dish. There was a really tall old guy who walked in at one point. After lunch, we went back to Grandma’s and made jam and scones. Harry and Madie came over- they fought each other. Had lovely dinner followed by a cream tea.

2011 (Age 17) – Had quorn bacon (which didn’t even taste like bacon… it was a weird beigy/pinky colour and was oblong. It looked like a giant plaster, and is nowhere near as good as their sausages, which actually taste like real sausages). Today was the final day of college. Had a whole rum and coke to myself and felt very light-headed, but gooood. Took advantage of my leftover printing credit, and printed off my entire book on the college printers.

2012 (Age 18) – Did a dodgy sketch of Gandalf. Had my haircut yesterday, and since I’ve washed it, it’s gone super boofy. Rewatched ‘The Impressionists’ BBC series- I love that show. Apparently my college is planning a boycott to protest the terrible timetable revisions.

2013 (Age 19) – Was woken at 1am by my Mum stumbling around, trying not to wake me up, but she ended up slapping her hand on my leg which was very funny. After our breakfast, we then walked through Copenhagen to where our open top bus tour was. There was a very stressed-out guy directing the buses, who told us ‘don’t get confused.’ Then me and Mum started joking around, and kept saying ‘don’t get confused’ at everything. The bus tour was great, but we realised that we could have got it from right outside our hotel instead of walking- whoops. We then had a picnic lunch at Tivoli pleasure garden. We debated whether to go on a roller coaster, but we had a double scoop of Ben & Jerrys instead. We reckoned that we used all the toilets in the gardens while we were there. Got lost trying to get to the hippy village, Christiania. When we got there, there was a guy with a ‘Free Hugs’ sign. All the houses and shops were painted with bright murals. We then went down a very strong-smelling street a.k.a the Green Light District, which is lined with people selling weed. Was definitely an experience.

2014 (Age 20) – Got excited when I started seeing little Swedish red cabins out the train window, along with lakes and mountains. Today was a day of settling in. Abisko national park is absolutely stunning, despite the drawback of 24 hour sunlight. Me and my room-mate have made little forts around the head of our beds to block out the light. In the girl’s cabin, we had a civilised dinner with a laid table and a water jug. In contrast, in the boy’s cabin, they all sat spread out, eating pizza, with unpacked shopping strewn on the floor. That night, one of the guys brought round a random German guy called Colin that he’d met at the main building.

2015 (Age 21) – Rob and I met up for a meal at ‘Rub Smokehouse’. We then went on to a few cocktail places.

2016 (Age 22)- Did some admin work for my charity e.g. clearing our email, setting up meetings etc. Looking forward to a relaxed evening of food, drink and TV.


6 thoughts on “The Childhood Diaries of a Nervous Girl (1st July)

  1. I see you’ve sampled some of the delights of our fair capital city, inc the infamous ‘green light district’, which the police keep demolishing, only for it to magically reappear in a matter of hours.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It seems the current shower of right-wing idiots in government think the ‘war on drugs’ is still winnable, hence a truly idiotic policy of harassment. It is amazing that Christiania has survived so long though. Long may it continue to be a symbol of freedom and alternative lifestyles.

        Liked by 1 person

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