The Childhood Diaries of A Nervous Girl… 16th May

So here it is. Another snapshot of my bizarre childhood, from age 11 to age 22.

2005 (Age 11)- Woke up. Went to school. Watched “The Belles of St. Trinians”.

2006 (Age 12)- Woke up. Went to school. Went to Gran and Grandpas. Had a trifle and watched ‘A Place in the Sun.’

2007 (Age 13)- Went to school. Some kid that eats near us randomly starting squashing his food on the floor which was a bit weird. We did 1950s showgirl dancing in P.E (God help me). I won a pound on bingo during P.S.E class. Watched a Scientology documentary where this journalist was followed around by Scientologists. My Mum went to her class. Me and Ade had a long conversation about probability which ended up on the subject of invisible aliens.

2008 (Age 14)- Did a funny contraception workshop where I had to put a condom on a model penis, just as my Mum warned me that I might have to. This caused great hilarity. Watched “Police Interceptors”. Gran and Grandpa came over for dinner. We had chicken crock-pot followed by toffee roulade, and then a Cointreau to finish.

2009 (Age 15)- My throat is still annoying. Tried swallowing honey and oil… eww! Revised.

2010 (Age 16)- Revision all day. Forgot to mention on Friday in the library, I walked straight into a potted plant and almost knocked it over. Me and Lucy caused a scene we were laughing that much.

2011 (Age 17)- Though that Alpacas were Star Wars characters, but apparently they’re Llama-like creatures. Tried to say ‘Have I’ to Lucy and it came out ‘a fa fa fa’. Sounded like an idiot. Today was Gran and Grandpa’s birthday meal. We had gorgeous lamb and then afterwards Grandpa brought out the most enormous chocolate torte. We all had pieces so big that they stuck out several inches from the bowl and that I’m certain could be seen by satellites in outer space.

2012 (Age 18)- Got wolf-whistled in the village by some boys but I don’t know if they were being sarcastic. Went to a restaurant for Gran and Grandpa’s birthday meal. Gran is now 80 and Grandpa is 76. Had goat’s cheese tartlet, salmon, and then the lemon meringue pie with fruit coolie- was like summer exploding in my mouth.

2013 (Age 19)- Mum rang and the first thing she said was ‘I’ve got a problem. I’m addicted to The Big Bang Theory.’ I’m glad she likes it though. Went to Tesco with Sergio where he bought out most of the shop.

2014 (Age 20)- Was Lizzie and Morgan’s joint birthday today, so I went over to Beeston to see everyone for some drinking fun times. We played the post-it note forehead game, Cards Against Humanity and Ring of Fire. Then we had arm wrestles.

2015 (Age 21)- It was Azeem’s flute recital today in the U.S.A. Watched the live stream. Everybody kept commenting with ‘Cheeky Nandos’.

2016 (Age 22) – Went and did my shift at Citizens Advice. Trying to finish my script before the competition deadline, but it’s hard to find the time at the moment. Watched ‘Game of Thrones’. Brilliant episode this week.

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5 thoughts on “The Childhood Diaries of A Nervous Girl… 16th May

  1. Great post, made me smile. Why is walking into things so irresistibly funny?

    I used to list St Trinians as my school on FB. People didn’t get the joke and kept asking ‘Why did you go to a girl’s school?’

    There is show on Danish TV (maybe also in UK?) where people get up on stage and read extracts from their teenage diaries. Based on the reaction of my girlfriend and the audience, it is very funny indeed. (my Danish isn’t good enough to really appreciate it)

    PS We both love TBBT too. And GoT too.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m glad you enjoyed it. And I would love to hear other people’s diary entries. I’m nosy like that (I’m the sort of person that looks in people’s windows as I walk by to see what sort of decor they have). I have walked into many things in my time, usually in a daydreamy trance.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh yes we both tend to do that whenever the opportunity arises. I think I’ve learned a sort of sixth sense over the years to watch out for lamp posts and trees while gawping into people’s homes.

        Liked by 1 person

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